Over the past 7 months...

Over the past seven months, I had time to think about my life. What High School I'm going to, what collage I'm going to apply to, what classes I'm talking. Those are all things that are running through my head. The past seven moths were filled with miracles, lust, hatred. My mother was healed from Cancer February 9th. And before I move on. In January, I broke up with Jarred and started dating someone new. Someone who acted more like a brother than a crush. For the past three months I have nothing but laughs, surprises, and love from him. At the time I thought he was a keeper. But throughout our relationship we were heading the wrong direction. The direction that turns people away from the Lord. So, with that said. I have been seeing a counselor about the things that are going on in my life. A lot of stuff needs to be fixed; I wish I could love him like a christian would. The was I love him right now is full of flesh and evil. With that said, This is going to be one for the hardest things in my life. To let him go and live the way God wants me to live. He says that we have to fight this battle, but what he doesn't know is that I fight for him everyday, I'm getting tired and I need rest and peace. He doesn't know what I'm going through. There was a point where I asked myself: "If he loves you than if you ask him to stop getting you in trouble multiple times, would he do it?". I knew the answer right away. I knew we were going to get back in our old habits. I knew that I can't go back, I need to look ahead and look towards the future. I asked God to give me the words to say to him, but I still don't know if I can even say the words: "It's over between us". I don't want to, It's not what my spiritual self wants, its what my flesh wants. I think there in everyone's life they ask the question of : "Do I really want to keep living this way." Some people are wise enough to listen and follow, and others ignore and hide from the truth, I know I did. I'm sick and tired of listen to the devil, I want to listen to truth and listen to what God has to say about me, I AM the daughter of the high king, who is not moved or shaken by the world, because she trust in her Heavenly Father, who guides and protects her. I AM chosen to live for him and tell my Testimony. I AM ready to live for him and I AM ready to see what Is in store for my life going into High School and so on. I want you to ask your self; what are you filling your life with? What are you living for? Where do you think you stand in the Lord's presents.

Truly yours,

Mikayla Pizzo